~CHURCH IN RICHMOND REALLY REACHING FOR PRAYER REQUESTS

Desperately in need of a car accident or cancer, members of Monument Congregational are really reaching for prayer requests sources reported Tuesday.

"Jessica's attempts to find the right prom dress have proven totally unsuccessful" said an obviously drained member to the congregation during the prayer request portion of last Sunday's service as other members sympathetically murmured in their pews.

"We're going to go to the city on friday to try and find something that will work and are hoping for...anything that will work."

"We faithfully place this in His hands," she added.

"Pastor?" Dean Saez said, raising his hand from his pew.

"Yes, Dean. Update us on your Sons's condition."

"Well he's still stuck working the frier. It's tough for him because he feels he's ready to work the register or even to restock the drinks," Saez responded, pausing to lean forward and clasp his hands. "He really needs our prayers at this time."