~PEPSI UNVEILS NEW 'PEPSI MYSTERY'

The carbonanted beverage world was fizzed up Friday when Pepsi announced its new scintillating product 'Pepsi Mystery'.

"We liked Wild Cherry, Pepsi Blue, Twist and Vanilla just fine," said Pepsi Vice president Charles Hammond to a crowd of reporters who had gathered for the press briefing. "But this time we wanted to keep America guessing. Go ahead, take a sip...and it's not ginger."

Hammond went on to explain that the new Pepsi cousin will come in a black bottle simply marked by a dark blue question mark "?" and that the nurtritional information will be written in an ancient Mayan script.
He also announced that Pepsi has hired Bo Jackson to be the spokesman for the new product and that he will appear in commericials dressed like Sherlock Homes, where he will spark America's favorite new catchphrase by puckering up in shock and saying "Wow, that's some good Pepsi...I hope it doesn't give me cancer."

Represenatives from Coca-Cola were reportedly shocked by the announcement saying that their spies inside the Pepsi organization had been fed false information about a new Pepsi ice cream. But Coke said that they had rebounded quickly and inside of 24 hours had concocted their own new mystery syrup dubbed "Coke Confusion" that will be hitting stores in a couple of weeks. "This one is totally going to fool you," said Coke marketing rep Dave Horlan. "it's not just a bunch of Coke and Mirrors"

Meanwhile, people all over the nation had begun drinking the new Pepsi and positing theories about what the new ingredient is.

"I'm telling you it's pomegranate!" argued Mel Thomas, 76, with his wife Marla, 74 of White Plains, Pennsylvania. "Would you shut up about the garlic?"
"Dang we're all out," he added. "We'd better stop and get some more."

"I don't know," suggested Jake Garret, 27 of Phoenix. "I'm almost tempted to say it's Nacho Cheese. They probably had some big screw up over there at the Doritos and Pepsi factory and had to unload this @#%$."
"I think I'm going to be sick."